How to recover from a relationship break-up
As a therapist I regularly treat people who are trapped in the pain of the past and endlessly re-living and rethinking a relationship break-up. They can’t just ‘let it go’ or ‘move on’ as everyone around them recommends they do. A break-up is a painful process but it can be processed with the correct strategy, and then the future can look rosy. Getting trapped in the past is stagnation and the solution is movement – on every level, physical, spiritual and emotional.
- Understand that nothing went wrong
- Don’t think – ‘do’. Thinking takes you to the past and increases emotional pain
- Exercise as soon as you wake up – never lie in bed and think. Movement gets chi moving so you can start the day with a sense of possibility
- Seek emotional satisfaction through meaningful contact with people – blog, post, tweet – or through the expressive arts – write a song / poem / paint
- Seek sexual pleasure (if this was a big part of your relationship a lack can trap you in the past)
- Reward yourself by immediately doing things you wouldn’t have done in the relationship (hot up your car, take up tango, get a dog or a goat etc).